HOW
I DEAL WITH SOLITUDE
I’ll be rumbling on this
blog post now. Terribly sorry for the rumbles! This is something that I don’t
usually write about and keep it inside. But I feel like sharing it with you. I
genuinely could shed tears writing this. But I’ll try not to. I’ll be the strongest person I can be.
Well without further a
do. Questions that have been in my mind for the past couple days. Have you ever
felt like you’re all on your own and no body gives you company and fed up of
being alone and seeing, in love couples walking through the parks arm in arm
and all that? And when you really need help, no body’s there, you’re
reluctantly asking for people’s help, and you end up doing anything you want
yourself without invloving people in it. That’s what I have been doing so far.
Being a singleton and deciding not to be enganged with what sort of ‘love’
thingy and all that stuff. Not denying the fact that sometimes people need
companies. Me included. More often than not, it’s got to the point where being
single sucks but sometimes it’s a good thing. Having heard from quite many
friends of mine moaning about being single and wanting to have
boyfriends/girlfriends makes me want to write this sort of thing. Prefer being
a singleton to being in love? Which one do you prefer? Do people have
preferences? I have no clue. Maybe they do, or maybe they don’t. But this is a
tip how I cope with my moment of solitude and overcome any feelings of
loneliness. This works for me.
1. Spend your time with your family and
friends. I must admit that my parents are living and working in the capital
city of Indonesian which is quite far from where I am studying now. The only
way to keep in touch with each other is by communicating through
calls/texts/social networks. I’m not very much open to them either, especially
when it comes to ‘solitude due to being a singleton’ *laughs*. Not my parents’
cup of tea at all. They kinda loathe it seeing me close to somebody and for the
time being their request is me focusing on the studies. When in terms of friends,
I have bunches, but there are only a few friends whom I could put my trust and
share anything with. Currently they are well-occupied. Therefore, feeling
loneliness comes to me very frequently, but I know the ways to escape from it
one of which is by getting together with friends and family. You’ll soon be getting
accustomed to it and you’ll find out how better it would be if we’re focused on
the studies rather than filling our minds with the things that might be a
distraction to our academic studies and our platonic relationships with people
like friends and family. You’ll soon realise a romantic partnership is not the
only one satisfying type of relationship.
2. The second thing that I now usually do is
getting out more. Getting yourself locked in a room with no ventilation and all
in pitch dark with curtains closed is not the best way to escape from loneliness.
You have a wonderful planet to see, places you need to explore, people you
gotta meet up, and events you gotta attend. I’ve come to a relisation that sitting in my
flat all day long will do nothing and it just makes me more pesimistic. You’re
already blessed with a great life, get out more and go to shop centres and
cinemas even on your own or you can take friends if you want to, but being on
your own sometimes makes you feel like you’re in your own world with you are
the only inhibitant in it, I do this quite often, and realistically I enjoy my
own company.
3. Build your self-confidence. I’ve been
doctrined by lots of articles that being in a relationship does not make you a
better and more successful person. Then, do not think less of yourself as a
person for being single. Rather this might be the best time for me to be even
greater and appreciate the little things in life. To make a fresh start and
feel better sometimes I treat myself like getting myself a book or a juice or a
movie or new clothes or do some running outside or anything. This could make
yourself feel much better. This works for me successfully.
4. Enjoy ‘me’ time. I’m writing this whilst listening to music and singing it along. What could be better than this? Haha. I used to be feeling argh and meh when it comes to loneliness. Now I always try to find a way out what productive thing I could do. Now Now when I feel like company, I either write, go out, or exercise or anything. Being down in the dumps locking yourself in a room all day long will get you nowhere. Sometimes treating yourself is a must. Treating yourself a movie, play, clothes, books, whatever you like to keep you motivated. Something you can enjoy on your own.
4. Enjoy ‘me’ time. I’m writing this whilst listening to music and singing it along. What could be better than this? Haha. I used to be feeling argh and meh when it comes to loneliness. Now I always try to find a way out what productive thing I could do. Now Now when I feel like company, I either write, go out, or exercise or anything. Being down in the dumps locking yourself in a room all day long will get you nowhere. Sometimes treating yourself is a must. Treating yourself a movie, play, clothes, books, whatever you like to keep you motivated. Something you can enjoy on your own.
5. This one thing I mostly do to get active
and exercise. I’ve come to the point where exercise or working out can be a get
away from loneliness and stress. Besides the fact that it’s also good for your
health. It can do both. If I’m feeling lonely or depressed I genuinely grab my
running shoes and go to the park close to my flat and enjoy my running time.
This is good for your body and soul. I got new running shoes the other day and
that makes me love exercise more by wearing the new shoes. Hehe Thanks ever so
much to mum for getting me running shoes as the late birthday present. This
helps me relieve stress and depression. You can also meet running buddies who
frequent your favourite running routes. Hehe stay active stay healthy!
6. Go on a trip! Bali is the tourism spot
I’ve been wanting to visit by far. Saving money and waiting on the perfect
time/holiday to come. Then soon I’ll explore. Trigger your adrenaline by
travelling on your own to new places you’ve never been to. I travel on my own
quite often to be perfectly honest. I do like it though. You don’t have to
negotiate other people’s companies and all you gotta do is decide anything you
want by your own self. It’s challenging. But when are you gunna try if not now?
Hehe
7. Last but not least, try not to idealize
relationships. Being in a relationship is sometimes not that easy as it may
seem. And sometimes people in couples could be lonelier than singletons. During
your solo time, think about what you want from your friends, family, and other
relationships in the future. Remember and keep it in mind that it’s way much
better being single and happy than in a bad relationship. All I want to say is
enjoy every minute of your life. You deserve to be happy for whatever you do in
life. You’re worth getting happiness. You’re worth a good future relationship,
and everything good usually is worth the wait. Stay positive. Be happy and
content within yourself and never think that you are not worthy because you are
not in a relationship, or that you're a "loser" for feeling lonely.
Neither of these are true! Instead, remind yourself to look on the bright side
of life, and that there's a lot of good things to be gained in moments of
singleness and solitude. Cheers.
Talk
to you later in a bit. I got to go to sleep earlier. Tomorrow I’ll have to
participate the ceremony in school. So I'll rest now! good night wonderful
people with wonderful hearts and souls!
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